The Irreverent Professor

Unvarnished realities about life, teaching, learning, and change in this wild, wild world

Archive for the month “December, 2014”

Once Upon A Time, 15 Years Ago…

I was just reminiscing about my wedding day.  We’ve been married fifteen years.  Fif-teen!  In these days of disposable marriages, I’m pretty proud of that.

Our wedding day.  A few years (and pounds) ago.

Our wedding day. The first dance.

I know everyone says marriage is hard.  It’s not.  At least not for me.  But I think that’s mainly because my husband is an extremely affable, friendly, conflict-avoidant guy.  The word everyone (and I mean everyone) uses to describe him is “nice.”  I don’t think that’s the word that first comes to mind when they meet me.

I grew up in a house where yelling was a perfectly acceptable form of communication.  We got mad, we yelled, we slammed doors, then hours (or days) later, we pretended nothing ever happened.  In my family, there was some crazy behavior (that in my childhood involved tossing me out a first-floor window and shuttling me over to my grandmothers to get me out of the middle of it).

My husband grew up in a Norman Rockwell painting.

Our wedding was a perfect illustration of our differences.  His dad was his best man.  He gave a perfect toast.  His mother made centerpieces and help decorate the reception hall.  They gave me pearls to wear on my wedding day.

For my part:

  • I got lost on the way to the church (or rather, my cousin got us lost taking a “shortcut”).
  • I had to carefully manage three (count ’em three) pews of parents…on MY side…to include my dad and his wife, my former stepfather and his then-wife, and my mom.
  • I forgot to put on my garter and didn’t realize it until they announced the garter toss (which was good, because there was only one single woman there and she would have been very embarrassed).
  • I chose a wedding venue with no alcohol permit so I wouldn’t have to worry about the behavior of certain members of my family.  As much.
  • I instructed them not to play the “Electric Slide” because I loathed it…and they did anyway. And it was a big hit.
  • The weather between Atlanta and Tennessee was so bad, most of my husband’s extended family couldn’t make it.  We had tons of food leftover and the venue staff ate well that night.
  • The music and video guy stepped outside in the middle of our ceremony to have a smoke and the “Ave Maria” played in a loop over and over…and over. I very nearly stepped away to turn the music off, but my almost-husband had my hand in a vise grip.

That last one was not my fault.  

But it was still a perfect day.

Older, wiser, a little heavier, but happy.

Older, wiser, a little heavier, but happy.

More importantly, it’s been an awesome marriage.  Fifteen years, six moves, one son, and countless jobs later, we’re still going strong.

Carpe anniversary!

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That’s What The Holidays Are All About…

Two things: (1) I don’t write a mommy blog, but this is about mommy stuff and (2) I’m sorry I haven’t written a blog post in a while. I miss it.  With the semester and my other work, time just got away from me.

Anyway, it’s the winter holiday season and you know what that means!  That’s right:

1) Grades are in and I’ve been completely burned out for a week or so, reeling from the exhaustion and brain fatigue that comes from grading finals, dealing with grade grubbers, and hoping my class would make for next semester. It didn’t :-(.

2) I’m doing the “politically correct” dance and waiting for repercussions for saying “Merry Christmas” (which is the holiday I celebrate…although more in a secular than in a religious way) versus “Happy Generic Winter Holidays If You Celebrate Any of Them.”

and

3) My sweet 5-year-old son is completely and totally out of control with excitement.

Just a few of our festive decorations.

Just a few of our festive decorations.

It’s a joy to be able to see his face light up as brightly as our Griswald-esque Christmas decorations. It is also a joy to be able to wield the “Santa’s going to put coal in your stocking” threat over his head. It’s a refreshing change from the threat of:

  • Time out
  • Spankings (yes, I know, barbaric, horrible, call DFACS, leave snide comments on this post if you must)
  • Taking away one or more toys
  • Forced child labor
  • Making him live in the backyard
  • Making him live in Siberia

or the truly cruel punishment of…gosh, I don’t even know if I should say it in a public forum…

  • Making him play with his toys in his room by himself.

We are truly evil, no? At least to our little extrovert. Being alone is the worst punishment he can think of. Although we have recently discovered another powerful threat: Telling his teacher, Mrs. T, that he’s been making bad choices. She’s a lovely woman, so I’m not sure what he’s afraid of, but I got this hint from him: “If you tell her, she’ll make me eat lunch by myself.” Ah.

He’s an interesting cat. A little super-extrovert athlete being raised by older introverted geeks. It’s going to be a wild ride.

In the spirit of the holidays, please allow me to share my favorite Boy-ism (so far) from my son this season: “When are we going to have hot chocolate? ‘Cause that’s what Christmas is all about.”

The reason for the season...according to my 5 year old.

The reason for the season…according to my 5 year old.

So have some hot chocolate and Happy Holidays!

Carpe hot chocolate!

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