I was just reminiscing about my wedding day. We’ve been married fifteen years. Fif-teen! In these days of disposable marriages, I’m pretty proud of that.
I know everyone says marriage is hard. It’s not. At least not for me. But I think that’s mainly because my husband is an extremely affable, friendly, conflict-avoidant guy. The word everyone (and I mean everyone) uses to describe him is “nice.” I don’t think that’s the word that first comes to mind when they meet me.
I grew up in a house where yelling was a perfectly acceptable form of communication. We got mad, we yelled, we slammed doors, then hours (or days) later, we pretended nothing ever happened. In my family, there was some crazy behavior (that in my childhood involved tossing me out a first-floor window and shuttling me over to my grandmothers to get me out of the middle of it).
My husband grew up in a Norman Rockwell painting.
Our wedding was a perfect illustration of our differences. His dad was his best man. He gave a perfect toast. His mother made centerpieces and help decorate the reception hall. They gave me pearls to wear on my wedding day.
For my part:
- I got lost on the way to the church (or rather, my cousin got us lost taking a “shortcut”).
- I had to carefully manage three (count ’em three) pews of parents…on MY side…to include my dad and his wife, my former stepfather and his then-wife, and my mom.
- I forgot to put on my garter and didn’t realize it until they announced the garter toss (which was good, because there was only one single woman there and she would have been very embarrassed).
- I chose a wedding venue with no alcohol permit so I wouldn’t have to worry about the behavior of certain members of my family. As much.
- I instructed them not to play the “Electric Slide” because I loathed it…and they did anyway. And it was a big hit.
- The weather between Atlanta and Tennessee was so bad, most of my husband’s extended family couldn’t make it. We had tons of food leftover and the venue staff ate well that night.
- The music and video guy stepped outside in the middle of our ceremony to have a smoke and the “Ave Maria” played in a loop over and over…and over. I very nearly stepped away to turn the music off, but my almost-husband had my hand in a vise grip.
That last one was not my fault.
But it was still a perfect day.
More importantly, it’s been an awesome marriage. Fifteen years, six moves, one son, and countless jobs later, we’re still going strong.